Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Trying so so so hard…

Not to whine and complain. Trying really, really, really hard. ‘Cause, let me tell you, with a 3 year old and a 6 year old in the house, I hear a lot of whining and complaining and it isn’t pleasant to the ears.

So the cancer, I’m dealing with it. It isn’t fun, surely we can agree on that, but what good will complaining do? Chemo last week was better. I got some new drugs to manage the nausea and vomiting and actually made it through the whole cycle without any food coming back up. Progress! Of course the steroids which are helping with the nausea are making me a little twitchy and aren’t particularly conducive to restful sleep. But I think Sean enjoys when I poke him in the back in the middle of the night to say “I can’t sleep” (seriously, the man deserves sainthood for putting up with me).

The kids are good, the chemo is manageable, my days are so much more good than bad…so what’s the problem? Well I seem to have torn open my abdominal muscle around my surgery site (I had about a 10 inch vertical incision in the middle of my abdomen). So I have a big fat abdominal hernia. Which makes it hurt to sit, stand, walk, breathe…you get the idea. Of course, I can’t have surgery because that would interrupt my chemo for ~10 weeks which isn’t a good idea. And they make lots of abdominal binders for hernias, but none that fit around a colostomy stoma. So I walk around like an idiot with my hands pressed against my stomach trying to keep my intestines from poking out of the hole in my abdominal muscle. Sound fun?

Last night I was having a coughing fit (at 11:30 pm, see note above about Sean needing sainthood) and desperately trying to press on the hernia so the coughing didn’t hurt so much. There may have been some profanity uttered, I can’t be certain. Finally, a light bulb went on over my head…Codeine…codeine is a cough suppressant…and a painkiller. Note to friends…never throw away prescription painkillers. Two vicodin and thirty minutes later, both Sean and I were sleeping peacefully. Obviously this strategy doesn’t work during daylight hours, but at least now I’m not whining about this blasted hernia 24 hours a day. Sixteen hours a day is plenty.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Go Codeine!
Lisa Marie, you are definitely not a whiner. But, hey, you deserve a couple, make that more than a couple, whiney moments.
Glad this last treatment was better. Love, Kim and Dave

Anonymous said...

Have you considered buying one of the regular hernia binders and cutting a hole where your stoma is and then building the bag around it. Just a little alterations. I did it with my breast pump. I got an old sports bra and I cut holes in the .....well you know where...and built the pump contraption around it so I could pump hands free wearing the rigged up bra. I bet we could figure out something similar to patch together to make things a bit easier for you. You are such a strong woman with such an amazing attitude. You have every right in the world to whine now and then. (We have all heard whining about far less significant things...at my house even within the last 5 minutes :) Glad your last chemo cycle was better.

Anonymous said...

Have you considered buying one of the regular hernia binders and cutting a hole where your stoma is and then building the bag around it. Just a little alterations. I did it with my breast pump. I got an old sports bra and I cut holes in the .....well you know where...and built the pump contraption around it so I could pump hands free wearing the rigged up bra. I bet we could figure out something similar to patch together to make things a bit easier for you. You are such a strong woman with such an amazing attitude. You have every right in the world to whine now and then. (We have all heard whining about far less significant things...at my house even within the last 5 minutes :) Glad your last chemo cycle was better. Erin

Leslie said...

Sister, I would be whining a ton more than you have been. Feel free. Glad it was better than last time. Think you both deserve sainthood. Keep on trucking!! We are all here behind you. Carole sends her love and lots of it.

Stephanie said...

I'm glad to hear that this last round of chemo was better than the first. I've been thinking about you tons and sending lots of good thoughts your way. Don't worry about whining -- you deserve to whine as much as you want. Hang in there and hopefully you or one of the doctors will come up with a way to help with the hernia. Love you lots, Steph

Renée said...

Was that one codeine for you and one for Sean????

I'm with everyone else. You and your sewing machine can definitely rig up something to help you through those other 16 hours.

Art Usher said...

I am sorry that your suffering continues to be aggravated by things other than chemotherapy.

cuz said...

http://www.makemeheal.com/mmh/product.do?id=33107

found this binder, it looks like maybe it could be easily adapted...did you ever notice that when you try to stifle a cough, it just makes you want to cough more...i heard chocolate was also good for coughs..chocolate during the day, codeine at night..life is good, hang in there..love ya

Mama T said...

man, you are a bigger, better person than me. I'd be in full-tilt whine mode and giving my kids a run for their whines. So, whatever you're doing, you are just blowing my mind. Now, off I go to whine about something unimportant. Hope you get more good sleep tonight:)

Anonymous said...

I'm so happy to hear that the 2nd chemo was more manageable than the first. And glad to hear you're not denying yourself a pain pill or two to get the restful sleep you deserve. Erin's suggestion re the custom hernia binder sounds like a great idea. Any new pics coming our way?? Love, Auntie Suzy

Vito said...

Glad to hear your chemo went better but sucks about the hernia. Whine all you want...I'm pretty sure having to deal with one medical thing much less multiple makes it acceptable. Sounds like it's time for me to send you another movie.

Also, I could not let this go by unremarked: "seriously, the man deserves sainthood for putting up with me" I've thought for years now that Sean was a saint for putting up with you. :-p
-Vito

StaceyEricSullivan said...

Whine to the Internet all you want because that is what we're here for!

Anonymous said...

I have two words: ACE BANDAGES.

-- Varina